Community’s Role in a Planetary Shift

Posted on July 7, 2013 by admin

Earth_Western_Hemisphere_transparent_backgroundThe ‘New Earth’ will come about through small groups of people coming together and dropping their egos. 

As the new consciousness emerges, some people will feel called upon to form groups that reflect the enlightened consciousness. These groups will not be collective egos. The individuals who make up these groups will have no need to define their identity through them. They no longer look to any form to define who they are. Even if the members that make up those groups are not totally free of ego yet, there will be enough awareness in them to recognize the ego in themselves or in others as soon as it appears. However, constant alertness is required since the ego will try to take over and reassert itself in any way it can. Dissolving the human ego by bringing it into the light of awareness – this will be one of the main purposes of these groups, whether they be enlightened businesses, charitable organizations, schools, or communities of people living together. Enlightened collectives will fulfill an important function in the arising of the new consciousness. Just as egoic collectives pull you into unconsciousness and suffering, the enlightened collective can be a vortex for consciousness that will accelerate the planetary shift.

Eckhart Tolle, pages 126-127 from A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose

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“Community as a Universal Way Of Living” – from the book The Sacred Matrix by Dieter Duhm

Posted on June 19, 2013 by admin

The original community of humans is not the family, but the tribe. The original community is the human vessel, into which all human life, including the family, is embedded. The community is a part of the Sacred Matrix. In it, the cosmic order connects with the social order. It is not bound to certain times or cultures, rather it is an integral part of our human social existence that lies beyond history. It could only be destroyed through violence, and it is only when we have found a full equivalent to the tribe that is aligned with our times, that we again can enter into full and wholesome relationships with each other.

ZEGG Community Event

ZEGG Community Event

Community is the universal organ that has experienced the greatest damage. It is a necessary part of the whole, which was destroyed worldwide. Everywhere, where people were abducted, enslaved or sold, communities were annihilated, thus destroying the life nerves of entire peoples. This process began with the Kurgan people’s invasion of Neolithic river settlements 7000 years ago. It continued as the Native American peoples of North America were annihilated by the European invaders during the 17th century, and we find it right up to the present day, when the last indigenous people on all continents are being driven out and destroyed in the name of commercial interests. The disappearance of human community left behind a bad wound in human civilization. It was through the destruction of community that humans lost their authentic morality and sense of responsibility. People were torn away from organic communities. Piece by piece, this also separated them from their own higher selves, from their higher knowledge, and from the higher orders of life. Community was and is the natural breeding ground for trust and solidarity. If this humus is missing, the uprooted human being becomes violent, evil, and ill.

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ZEGG’s Twelve Theses for a Nonviolent World

Posted on March 14, 2013 by admin

by Dieter Duhm, 1992

The worldwide violence against animals, children and nations demands a new concept of human civilization. The inner and outer crises are two aspects of the same problem–a problem that can only be understood or resolved if both aspects are considered. For several years, Project Meiga – Experiment for a Humane Earth – formed in Germany, has been working to form an international cooperative for a human existence free of fear and violence. The following 12 theses emphasize the direction of this effort. Continue reading →

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Radio Interview on “It’s the Way of Love!”

Posted on September 24, 2012 by ferrar

Kelly was interviewed on the radio show, “It’s the Way of Love!”, on August 18, 2012. Below is an excerpt about supporting Occupy Monterey, using the Zegg Forum process to regain trust and connection after some trying times…

[soundcloud url=”http://api.soundcloud.com/tracks/78242224″ params=”” width=” 100%” height=”166″ iframe=”true” /]

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It takes a village to raise a consciousness!

Posted on September 24, 2012 by Kelly

“Why can’t you just admit it! You were too projecting your judgments onto Jane! Weren’t you John!” said the head of Fred with bulging eyes and forehead veins.  At this John walks out of the room to never come back to this newly forming New Culture Community group again.  “No wait, he didn’t mean to hurt your feelings…” cried Jane down the hallway after him. Here we have a small but complete example of what Clinton Callahan calls “Low Drama” from his Next Culture trainings work. (See http://nextculturetrainings.org)  We have the victim John, the perpetrator Fred and the rescuer Jane unconsciously playing out their painful and destructive roles in what is called the Karpman Drama Triangle.

Fortunately this group had invited a New Culture Community trainer to help them grow their skills and consciousness for an upcoming weekend workshop.  These three people were not new to personal growth, in fact all three were what you might call workshop junkies.  I have known them all for many years and witnessed their struggles with people and power.  Unfortunately the way they communicated and reacted in these kinds of situations had not evolved much in my opinion.

Fred received a lot of priceless feedback thru the community building process called The Zegg Forum. (See https://languageofcompassion.com/about/zegg-forum/)  Fred got into the middle of the psychodramatic Zegg Forum process and did his best to express what was alive, authentic and true, but kept saying he felt stuck, and distant from the group and the only feeling word he  came up with was feeling “separate”.  After his “performance” others were invited to give him reflective mirrors (expressions, comments) about his piece.  I went into the middle of the circle and expressed my sadness that the only words Fred used to express himself were spatial images like “separate” or “distant”.  I spoke of my own frustration at not getting the sense of personal connection I wanted to feel with Fred at the being/emotional level.  (The facilitator and others expressed similar discomfort at not being able to feel Fred’s heart in his words, as he seemed to speak only from his head.)  I also expressed in words, sounds and movement what I thought was the elephant in the room, Fred’s sadness, loneliness, longing for connection to himself and the community.  Fred later thanked me for “not being nice” in my mirror to him as the honesty impacted him in a way that allowed him to access and deeply feel his sadness and thereby bridge a connection to himself and thereby to others.  (For a good book on this subject I recommend “Don’t be Nice, be Real” by Kelly Bryson MFT)

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Nonviolent Communication (NVC) and Sex, Love and Intimacy

Posted on June 14, 2011 by Kelly

Chip August: Welcome to “Sex, Love & Intimacy”, I am your host Chip August. Today’s show I’m talking to Kelly Bryson. Kelly’s quite an interesting guy, he’s a licensed psychotherapist who specializes in marriage family therapies. He’s a certified trainer for the Center for Nonviolent Communication. He’s the author a great book called “Don’t Be Nice, Be Real” and the subtitle is “Balancing Passion for Self With Compassion For Others” and he’s a contributor to a recent anthology I saw called “A Marriage of Sex and Spirit”. He’s really…all of that and a really interesting fellow and a nice guy. Hopefully, we’re going to be talking today about non-violent communication, sometimes called NVC, sometimes called Compassionate Communication. It’s a style of communication that I think…I’ve done some studies in and that a lot of people I know have done some work on and I think is sort of…in my mind is the technology for the 21st century on how to communicate without hurting, pushing away, being aggressive, being violent. It’s an extraordinary technique, so we’re going to be talking about NVC and Compassionate Communication. We’re also going to really take a look at ineffective and sometimes really tragic ways that people communicate and see if we can come up with some alternatives, and I’d like (I hope)  we’re going to talk a little bit about how to use this kind of communication in sex, in relationships, in all kinds of things that couples face. So, I’m looking forward to an interesting conversation with an interesting friend.
*BREAK*
Kelly Bryson: I think as one of the major difficulties, major problems you can say, couples have is that when they’re in pain, instead of asking for understanding, they tell the other person what’s wrong with them. What they did, what they should have done and they usually do so in terms that are exaggerative or imply blame, or imply wrongness in some way. I say just what they did, but I do so in observational language. I don’t say “You left a mess in the bathroom”, I say “You left your clothes on the floor.” So just that is a big shift. One element that non-violent communication helps us with a lot is to train us to begin thinking in these terms, is how to have empathy, how to have not just mental reflectings, know how to have impactive sensing. How to feel into what’s going on energetically with the other person. This, I’ve been told, is what makes great lovers. And of course that never makes anybody feel safe and open… “Oh NOW I’m…I’ve been in denial! That’s where I’ve been, let me come out. Now I want to make myself vulnerable and naked and trust you now that you’ve called me those names.”
Chip August: Well behind every inhuman deed is a human need. I love that.
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THE POWER OF A CONCRETE UTOPIA by Dieter Duhm

Posted on June 14, 2011 by Kelly

Excerpt from the book: The Sacred Matrix by Dieter Duhm

If we want to overcome war, we need a concrete vision for peace. If we want to overcome the powerful global field of violence, we need a concrete vision for a powerful global field of peace. During the student revolution in the Sixties, we experienced how easily people are united to fight against something, yet at the same time find it difficult to live together. We were able to solve the problem of a police barricade, but we were unable to solve the problem of dishwashing in our communal households, the problem of hierarchy in our groups, and especially the problem of sexuality. Apart from the slogans for a life free from domination, we had no positive vision and no concrete utopia for a new lifestyle. Most struggles for liberation were fights against existing injustice and were not a fight for the realization of a clearly seen and realistic vision for peace and justice.

TAMERA’s* task is to develop a concrete utopia for a new type of human civilization and society and a new way of connecting our life with the beings of Nature and the powers of Creation. Such a concrete utopia contains a relatively precise image and a complex informational totality for a real culture of peace. The difference between utopia and illusion is that utopia is compatible with the inner blueprint and the possibilities of reality, i.e. of the universe. All beings carry a concrete utopia (a so-called “entelechy” and a sought-for inner gestalt) inside of them that guides their development. The power of concrete utopia is immense. It turns a seed into a full-size tree, a caterpillar into a butterfly, and an embryo into an adult. Individuals do not have this power on their own, but through their connection with the whole. Concrete utopia is the matrix or blueprint through which the power of the whole can flow into the individual and bring it into being. If a caterpillar wanted to become a butterfly on its own, it would have an impossible task. Concrete utopia is the power in life that takes all beings beyond their present limitations. Continue reading →

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Zegg Forum Guidelines

Posted on March 17, 2011 by admin

For Facilitation:

  • Become familiar with these ZEGG Forum Guidelines before facilitating.
  • Set rules, time, and goal or theme like, “Exploring what it means to have Peace between men & women.
  • With new people ask them if they are willing to follow the suggestions of the facilitator at least once before deciding not to.
  • Don’t suggest or push the participant to do something that you would do yourself.
  • If you feel yourself getting personally involved at any moment then ask your co-facilitator or another skilled person to take over for that piece.
  • Be transparent when making decisions.
  • Admit your errors, take time to go inside, don’t allow yourself to feel pushed because you’re the facilitator.
  • When a participant is finished and has sat down, ask if they want mirrors or commentaries from the audience, especially if they are new to the process.
  • Mirror a synthesis of the mirrors at the end of each piece after all other mirrors have been expressed.
  • Mirror a synthesis or overview of any theme(s) that arose overall or bring together all the loose threads of the theme of the forum after all pieces have been expressed.
  • Only deviate from the guidelines when you know them very well, have had a good amount of experience, and you are very aware that you are making the choice to deviate led by your intuition.Other important considerations to hold intention for:
  • See the highest in each participant.
  • Support congruence between what is said with the voice and what is acted with gestures.
  • Support participants to stay in the present moment.
  • Guide in order to bring out the truest motives and feelings, the beauty and the soul of the participant.

For Co-Facilitation:

  • Your role is to be there to support the facilitation and the process to see what the facilitator misses, sometimes to correct or to ask if it seems that the performance appears one-sided.
  • The facilitator can ask you for feedback on what you have seen so far and perhaps for suggestions as to how to proceed.
  • Also, always hold a willingness to go into the center and give mirrors.

For Audience:

  • Participate SILENTLY with full attention, always without any judgement or condemnation and with love and discernment.
  • Never comment out loud, never interfere.
  • Hold an attitude of non-judgmental curiosity.
  • Volunteer to mirror when you feel moved to respond from a supportive place.
  • Everything that is said in the center of the circle during a ZEGG Forum is to be kept confidential (speak about people or intimate matters concerning others and yourself only when they are present).
  • If and when you are triggered into your ‘stuff’ from what is brought up in the middle, wait 24 hours before bringing it up to the group or the participant.

The Participant:

  • Tell very briefly why you have come into the middle and what you would like to achieve there.
  • Be open to experimenting. Follow the facilitator’s suggestions and answer their questions holding the intention to make yourself visible and be open, tracking down and revealing one’s truth.

Mirrors:

  • It is best to give mirrors for people whom we feel love for.
  • If you are not interested in the person and what they expressed in the middle then don’t give feedback.
  • Respond from a self-referenced expression of honesty rather than giving advice.
  • Leave out your own personal story when mirroring (i.e. “that makes me think of my own experience…”).
  • Do not respond with a mirror from a place of reactivity, as in a knee-jerk reaction, or when your buttons are pushed.
  • If and when you are triggered into your ‘stuff’ from what is brought up in the middle, wait 24 hours before bringing it up to the group or the participant.
Please remember that the aim of the ZEGG Forum is to serve beauty and truth. 
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Vibrant Living thru Nonviolent Communication with Kelly Bryson MFT and Tory Blue

Posted on November 9, 2010 by Kelly

Vibrant Living Radio Interview w/Kelly Bryson & Tory Blue

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Welcome to the website for Kelly Bryson MA, MFT.

Posted on October 21, 2010 by admin

Kelly Bryson MA, MFT is a licensed psychotherapist and authorized trainer for the international Center for Nonviolent Communication (a nonprofit organization). Kelly is presently residing in Köln , Germany.

What you find on this website
There’s a lot of great content here presented with Kelly’s inspiring humor, wit, and wisdom. Here are just a few of the things you’ll find:On this website you will find valuable information about Nonviolent Communication including:
•   a way to order helpful books & compact discs
•   info about presentations or trainings for your business, church or organization
•   a calendar of local classes and presentations

  • Kelly’s dynamic speaking topics geared toward improving organizational communication
  • info about his best selling book “Don’t Be Nice, Be Real. Balancing Passion for Self with Compassion for Others.
  • an anthology Kelly contributed to: “The Marriage of Sex and Spirit: Relationship at the Heart of Conscious Evolution” (With Deepak Chopra, Marianne Williamson, John Gray, has been voted “Best Health / Sexuality Book” in the Best Books 2006 National Book Awards.)
  • free original articles like “Don’t pay the Price of being Nice”
  • poems like “The Places you could go if you weren’t afraid of No”
  • list of organizations served
  • testimonials about his work
  • Kelly’s resume and biography.

Below is Kelly’s blog where you’ll find outstanding articles, songs, videos, and interviews.

Thank you for supporting me and my work 🙂

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