Trust Based Relationships, continued

Trust Based Relationship Values	&.	Tradition Based Relationship Values
Needs are not compromised		Sacrifice and Compromise Valued
Insists on having both Freedom & Security		Sacrifices Freedom for Security
Communication open to trusted community		Communication open only to nuclear family
Sexual needs and behavior consciously negotiated to a win/win		Sexual needs and behavior determined via rolls
Consensual Morality is guide		Conventional Morality is guide
Power With thru connecting communication		Power Over thru intimidation and emotional coercion
Great value place on communication/negotiation		Great Value place on knowing and doing the right thing – (so communication less needed)
Transparency trusted and valued		Protecting partner from being triggered valued
Security comes via trust in oneself, other & nature		Security comes via control of environment
Natural Giving only from the Heart		Giving from Duty, Obligation, Roles, Sacrifice
Diversity of Sexual Desire/Expression Celebrated etc		Sex after marriage, lights out, Man on top
Focus on Personal Growth		Focus on Survival and being good
Non Possessiveness		Possessive
Jealousy seen as a need for support		Jealousy seen as a proof and part of Love
No Shoulds or have to’s		Many Shoulds and have to’s
Life and all beings held as Sacred		Mankind seen as having Dominion over Nature
God seen as equally loving all living beings		God seen as Jealous, w/ certain people held as the chosen

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