Trust Based Relationships, continued

Trust Based Relationship Values
&. Tradition Based Relationship Values
Needs are not compromised Sacrifice and Compromise Valued
Insists on having both Freedom & Security Sacrifices Freedom for Security
Communication open to trusted community Communication open only to nuclear family
Sexual needs and behavior  consciously negotiated
to a win/win
Sexual needs and behavior determined via rolls
Consensual Morality is guide Conventional Morality is guide
Power With thru connecting communication Power Over thru intimidation and emotional coercion
Great value place on communication/negotiation Great Value place on knowing and doing the right thing – (so communication less needed)
Transparency trusted and valued Protecting partner from being triggered valued
Security comes via trust in oneself, other & nature Security comes via control of environment
Natural Giving only from the Heart Giving from Duty, Obligation, Roles, Sacrifice
Diversity of Sexual Desire/Expression Celebrated etc Sex after marriage, lights out, Man on top
Focus on Personal Growth Focus on Survival and being good
Non Possessiveness Possessive
Jealousy seen as a need for support Jealousy seen as a proof and part of Love
No Shoulds or have to’s Many Shoulds and have to’s
Life and all beings held as Sacred Mankind seen as having Dominion over Nature
God seen as equally loving all living beings God seen as Jealous, w/ certain people held as the chosen
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